As if dating in the 21st century isn’t already some bullshit, COVID-19 comes around and quarantines us to sit our asses down either alone, with a loved one or with somebody that’s full of the shits.
COVID-19 is this ridiculous virus that’s going around the world causing people to become ill or unfortunately suffer the fate of death. Who the hell wants to be alone during this time, when the world seems to be ending and you’re confused on whether to go all in with someone or pull back a little because, even before this, you knew better?
Listen, my dating life was already bad before COVID decided to come in and bring the bullshit. I’m a walking, talking example of why women stay in relationships that are simply comfortable but bring them no joy. Because dating loser after loser is exhausting as hell and I stay trying to find energy to keep up with the nonsense I keep getting myself involved in.
Since my last real relationship (that lasted two years longer than it should have) ended in July, I have entertained one exhausting ego after another. Some have left me asking myself “wtf, Are you this bored?” Others have made me lose all hope in presentation because, there’s no way someone could bring me so much joy, treat me like a queen, then catch me off guard with lies and deception.
All I know is, since COVID put us on lockdown, my phone has been the go to place for apologies, truths and accountability. COVID is showing me who people always were.
There’s the guy I haven’t seen in over two years but, we had so much fun when we were together. He really wants to chill and drink some bourbon and smoke cigars over the COVID break. Wait, does this mean I’m gonna just hangout, then go back home. Or, will I get to stay a few days and he actually feed me too since I am hungry? Will we really just drink bourbon and smoke cigars after all these years? Seriously, why now? Where did I fall in the COVID lineup?
Then, there’s the guy I met in September where our first date was to the Farmer’s Market. OMG! I was in love! Ok, not really but, that was a dream date of mine. I always imagined walking around the market with someone while sampling fruits, drinking smoothies, and carrying our reusable bags together. Our second date was wine and cheese on my rooftop. Sex-y! For two months we did so much together and had an absolute blast! Like, omg, he could be THE ONE! Then, silence.
He ghosted me. Turns out, he had just found out he had a whole baby and claims he didn’t know how to tell me. You’re a grown man. Open. Your. Mouth! You see, he didn’t think I’d be so cool and he’d actually like me so he never thought we’d get to that point of telling me. Anywho, I’m suddenly getting messages like “hey, how are you?” Mother-fucker, I’m good.
How about the really great guy I met at the end of December that I would have never known had a whole girlfriend if he hadn’t resisted my Facetime request because he had “a friend” staying with him during COVID. Red. Damn. Flags. He wanted to make it like I was overreacting and “acting up” but, COVID came through with the revelation.
Look, COVID is about to make or break some friendships or relationships. Don’t find yourself as anybody’s option during this time when you can just keep working on yourself and being hopeful that the right person comes along after the storm. As if dating without COVID isn’t already hard enough, let it be your dating truth teller during this time.
Teller about yourself and truth teller about these men who insist on having it all….. except you, for once.