When your online presence attracts the masses and your reality is utter chaos, how does your soul respond?

We live in a society where we are judged daily by what we post, how we comment, and how our pictures are perceived. Truth is, many of us are living a lie. An internet story that’s waiting to unfold.

I live a life of transparency. From the moment I wake up, lay on the floor and stretch,  I make a mental note to be genuine and truthful with anyone I come in contact with. My Facebook followers and friends know, if it’s on my mind, I’ll probably type it. If I think it, I will repeat it. Sometimes I get a “Put the glass down” text from a girlfriend who is just mad I didn’t fill her in on everything first.

Mental health has been a priority of mine since I was 15 years old. A depressed, broken teenage mother who needed an outlet to release. No one would take me to the doctor to receive the help I requested so I prayed the crazy away while cutting and self medicating to relieve the pain.

It wasn’t until I landed a full time job after college that I faced a reality that my teenage wounds never healed. One day I woke up crying and decided to call in to work. I called in a mental health day. No one understood how that even existed. I told them I didn’t feel well. My son asked a friend’s mom if he could stay with them a few days and I went to get help. I needed to talk to someone. The medicine made me sad and vulnerable. For years, the medicine helped me live a lie of strength and an image of perfection.

Then came Facebook and other forms of social media. A place where we were given the chance to create the life everyone would envy, be proud of and admire. Somewhere throughout my social media journey, I decided to be truthful and escape the medication. It became my therapy, my outlet to breathe.

I watch people post pictures of their perfect family, their perfect kids, and perfect careers. I watch people post their perfect relationships. When things aren’t so perfect, I watch them disappear, then create some image of strength, a lie of convenience. While I choose to be transparent in my life, I can’t help but want to know why that perfect relationship you kept posting about fizzled so quickly. Details, I need details! Tell me the good and the bad.

We judge people from those perfect pictures, those emotional captions.

My transparency allows me to be truthful with myself and authentic with others whose voice isn’t as loud as mine. I am who I am and you’d never have to worry about anything different. So, when you meet me and we get to know each other, there’s no way I’d ever STFU when my voice is what got your attention in the first place.

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You don’t have to be as loud and open as I am. The only thing we all must be is truthful with ourselves. If taking a mental health break is necessary, do it. If seeking therapy or someone to talk to is necessary, do it. Creating an image that supports a lie only masks the pain. It’s ok to be perfectly imperfect.

Take care of yourselves and each other. Peace!

 

 

 

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